4/27/23

One of the biggest challenges to being a “golfer” is the time commitment it requires.  If golf is your profession, then you have some leeway in how much time you can commit to it.  Work is work. Most of us are ready, willing, able to make sacrifices for our jobs. Earning a viable living to care for ourselves and those we love and to whom we are obligated is an uwavering necessity for most adults. People working in the golf industry have the same devotion to their occupation as we all do.

For those of us who do not work in the golf industry, our time spent on golf is more of a choice and avocation. I submit that for most “committed” (dare I say obsessed/addicted) “golfers”, finding balance between life and golf is a most daunting task. When a person says with conviction that he/she is a “golfer,” that statement is not just about participating in a hobby; it’s about making a statement about how you live your life. Generally, being a “golfer” has little to do with ability or prowess. “Golfers” come in all abilities. Being a “golfer” is about your approach to the game as a “way of life.” Before painting the broadest brush about people who golf, let me further clarify my definition of being a “golfer.”  A person who hits golf balls, in any form or fashion, more than three times a week, is definitely a “golfer”. A person who seriously, committedly, and continuously keeps their handicap index, is definitely a “golfer.” A person who regularly sacrifices other important obligations in their life to play golf, is definitely a “golfer”.  A person who plays in any kind of weather, is definitely a “golfer”. There are other specific descriptions of being a “golfer”, but those mentioned “paint a solid picture.” Being a “golfer” is anything but a casual approach to the game. To the contrary, people who get out to the golf course when they can and rarely practice simply play golf. These people actually may love the game but unlike “golfers”, are not IN love with the game. They keep golf in a place where it’s not near the top of their priority list. Unlike “golfers”, they resist the notion that “Golf is a demanding mistress.”

Over the years, I have really struggled regarding the balance between golf and other life obligations. I try to make time to play or practice golf as much as I can.  I admit that I have not always made the best choices when deciding whether to do something golf related or not. I can blame the Dopamine golf produces in my system for driving my decision-making, but that’s not a legitimate excuse. Ultimately, an adult is responsible for his/her decisions…period. Admittedly, in my attempts to be a responsible adult over the last forty years or so (with a modecum of success), I have not always been as successful as I could have been where golf was involved. Golf had a high priority for me when other more important things should have been higher. There were times when I chose golf over more quality times with my family.  There were times when I chose golf over more committed time on my job. I regret a lot of those decisions. Alas, “youth is wasted on the young.” If I could pass on advice to my younger self, I would tell him to cut back on golf and make the best of opportunities that only belong to the young. There is only a limited time to build a positive family and career. Lord willing, if you live long enough, there will be time to play all the golf you want, after your family has grown and your career has been established. No need to force the issue in your young adulthood, sacrificing valuable “building time,” when your priorities need to be in more important places.

I share this blog topic because maybe it can be helpful. I know that I am not alone or all that unusual. A lot of us are very much IN love with this game and embrace being “golfers”. Maybe a consideration for other “golfers” might be to try to find a more balanced perspective going forward. Maybe there are young adult “golfers” out there who might consider putting golf on the “back burner” for a bit?  You don’t have to give the game up, but as your life takes on more responsibilities, you could keep golf in a more balanced place to reap the joys of a full and well-lived life? Having shared this personal perspective based on my journey and DESPITE having been a “golfer” since 1985, I have a wonderful and loving family who have borne the brunt of my golf addiction (especially my ever-forgiving wife). I have had a positive and fulfilling work life. I am extremely grateful for my blessings! I attribute my good fortune to the old adage that says, “God takes care of babies and fools.”  My personal addendum to that old adage is, “…and I have not been a baby since President Kennedy was in office.” Even in my folly, God has blessed this old fool richly, and I am humbly and extraordinarily thankful!!