5/27/22

As very young children in nursery school, we probably all had a category on our first report cards where we were graded on our abilities to “play well with others.”  We try to teach young children that getting along with other people is a skill that will pay huge dividends for them in life.  One of the great gifts from playing golf, in general, is the relationships built with others on the course and around the game.  Most golfers extol the joy that comes from playing with other people, no matter who those people are.  At the end of a round, a common thought from most golfers, regardless of the results or level of play, “The company was good.” This is a fundamental and vital premise for the average golfer.  For many public course players, being paired with complete strangers is quite common.  It has been my experience that it is rare to find a “jerk” on the golf course.  Generally, a friendly round where golf etiquette is followed leads to a very enjoyable experience.  Often, new friends are quickly made on public golf courses. Things might get a little more complicated if competition/gambling enters the equation. Even then, though, golf tends to lend itself to good sportsmanship and collegiality. So, what is the effect of race on golf’s version of “playing well with others?”

Part of my love of golf is that I will play with anyone at any time. Not all golfers feel this way, but I have always enjoyed playing with others.  I, too, find great joy in playing alone. I love golf…period!  Age, skill level, ethnicity, temperament, etc. will not deter me from playing or enjoying the game I love.  There are circumstances where I will not play with someone more than once. On occasion, the chemistry between golfers is not always positive.  However, in general, I guess my love for the game is not impaired by “the company I keep” (including my own).  I have played in all types of racially mixed groups. I have been in golf environments where I am the only black golfer present.  I have been in golf environments where all the golfers playing are black.  I have played (as a guest) at private clubs where there are only white members.  I have played at public courses where the pre-dominate people playing are black.  I have played in groups, as a black man, where the other players are all Asian.  My experiences with race and golf vary. For the most part, I have felt comfortable in any environment.  It’s the golf that makes the experience enjoyable and binds us all in commonality.  To be honest, though, I am the most comfortable in an environment that is completely mixed.  In those environments, race is not a factor at all.  In environments where one group is dominant, the dominance of one group brings racial culture into play.  If I’m in the dominant group (predominantly black), I feel very comfortable and uninhibited.  If I am in the minority, after years of processing that experience, I feel comfortable but not uninhibited. Being inhibited is not uncomfortable for me nowadays; I have lots of practice processing that experience.  Sadly, however, the reality of living in a country that has always maintained a consistent air of racial discord means that that tension is inescapable in just about every circumstance…including the great game of golf.  In addition, golf has a history of racial exclusion and intolerance that is real, not just inferred or imagined. So, even in golf, race matters.  My prayer is that that will not be the case for my grandchildren. I want them to love the game (and its people, too) in all aspects, uninhibited and unabashed!!!

The bottom line (in golf) regarding “playing well with others,” love and respect the game, the course, and your fellow golfers. Do what you can to make EVERY golfer feel welcomed and included. Golf is a community bound by this great game. Every course needs to adopt the mantra, “ALL golfers are welcomed and embraced.”  Golf binds all golfers under one calling above ALL others…enjoy the game in its fullness; we are kindred spirits!!